Sorry Noodle, Wonka Is A Forgettable Mess Of A Musical
Following critical acclaim with the Paddington films, Paul King returns to the silver screen to direct Wonka, exploring the origins of a young Willy Wonka before the events of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
Timothée Chalamet takes on the titular role in the early days of his career as a chocolatier. In an opening reminiscent to Sweeney Todd’s arrival in London, Wonka sails by boat to a city to make his fortune in chocolate, only to learn its run by the “Chocolate Cartel.” This trio of corporate candymen — Slugworth (Paterson Joseph), Fickelgruber (Mathew Boynton), and Prodnose (Matt Lucas) — will stop at nothing to keep control of the chocolate industry, especially from someone with such unique chocolate vision as Wonka.
While this premise is promising in its wackiness, the entire film suffers from a lack of magic and whimsy. This is surprising coming from the director of both Paddington and Paddington 2 that showcased King’s ability to seamlessly bring that energy to the screen with charm. While there are some creative design elements — like Wonka’s short lived pop-up chocolate shop — the majority of the film feels flat and almost “green screen”-like. Even the scrumptious and wildly named candies that Wonka produces don’t look tasty… they just look like CGI.
Chalamet does his best to show off the eccentric nature of Wonka, but he ultimately just comes across as “movie star Timothée Chalamet.” There are several moments where he is meant to be wholesome and charming, but instead seems awkward and like he’s trying too hard. His Wonka is also missing some of the selfishness and hint of darkness that we see in the versions of the Roald Dahl character by Gene Wilder and Johnny Depp.
Along with this chocolate mafia, Wonka must also deal with Mrs Scrubbit (Olivia Colman), who is a mixture of Matilda’s Ms Trunchbull, Sweeney Todd’s Mrs Lovett, and Les Miserables’ Madame Thenardier. She, alongside Bleacher (Tom Davis), trick Wonka into laundry servitude to pay off his debts. This leads to another problem with the film. While Colman does a great job with what she’s given, much of the film feels like its pulling inspiration from better musicals and not doing it well. And yes, for those who may not have realized from the trailer, Wonka is indeed a musical. Unfortunately, the music itself is laughably bad and forgettable. We’re introduced to Wonka’s fellow laundry workers in the unoriginal working song possibly titled “Scrub Scrub,” while a sentimental song sung by Noodle (Calah Lane) that had promise is ruined by Wonka trying to finds words to rhyme with “Noodle.” Later on, Wonka and Noodle get an almost Greatest Showman-style scene (as seen above), pulling from yet another better musical. In fact, one of the most laugh out loud moments is during a song where Wonka solemnly singing “Sorry Noodle” over and over again in a weird interlude.
The film also suffers from pacing issues that introduce more interesting storylines like the “Chocolate Cartel” and even our first look at Lofty, the Oompa Loompa (Hugh Grant), too late in the game. Many of the supporting actors from Hugh Grant to Keegan-Michael Key to Rowan Atkinson felt like glorified cameos that didn’t add much to the story. In other instances, there were too many characters that didn’t get enough screen time — like with the laundry workers — so it took away from the message they were trying to land on when it came to found family. Through all that, Calah Lane gives the best performance of the film as the hopeful, yet skeptical, Noodle.
Sorry Noodle, but Wonka is mediocre. It tries to bring in elements reminiscent of other musicals in a very unoriginal way and with a musical soundtrack you will soon forget. After loving the magic and whimsy of the Paddington films, this was a disappointing turn by King.
Wonka premieres December 15 in theaters.
